Welcome! Today is LAUNCH DAY here at BeautifullyHeld.com. I am excited you have taken the time to stop by and check it out. I must have started this post a dozen times and a dozen times I failed to write it. “Where do I begin?” I’d ask myself. Each time I’d begin at the point of the pain. Then I would reconsider, whispering “You can’t start a new thing with such sadness.” The truth is, no matter how much I try to avoid it, this is the place it has to start because it’s where I am; in the midst of pain. Healing starts at the place where the hurt began. So, this is our story.
One year ago our world turned upside down with a phone call. “Something is wrong with Heath.” the voice said. It’s hard for me to relive the events of that day and the two weeks that followed. So much life yet to live but suddenly cut off. A young family still to grow up but severed at the core. This had become our reality. It was completely unbelievable. My husband had suffered a massive stroke that left him on life support. He soon went to be with Jesus and over the last year my three young kids and I have struggled to find our way to a new “normal”.
I imagine we all come to a point in our lives where we face a crossroads in our faith. For me, this has been it. The death of my husband at such a young age has shaken me beyond what I could even explain. I have experienced all of the stages of grief; sometimes all at once. However, no matter how far I fall in my grief, I always fall straight at the feet of Jesus. He is my safe place. He is where I can ask the tough questions, express my strongest fears, and pour out the deep sorrows of my heart that cause me to collapse into a heap of mournful sobs.
Time and time again over these last months, I’ve had to decide to trust God in His sovereignty rather than reject Him for it. There are still broken parts of my heart that only He can fix. So, I will continue to press into His word, to seek His face and His healing. I remember the first thing I asked of the Lord after returning home without Heath: “Will I be found faithful through this?”
Yet, what has overshadowed the question of my own ability to remain faithful or not, is GOD’S FAITHFULNESS to us in such horrible circumstances. The story of God’s faithfulness through this season of our lives is one that is miraculous in itself. It’s a story that I feel the Lord has called me to share so stay tuned. It’s coming!
In the meantime, I’ll be blogging about all things faith, family, and my many misadventures in home repair and maintenance (think hedge trimming with a weed eater..oh boy!). Although I don’t recommend that, I’ll tell you the story of when I thought it was a good idea. We will most definitely laugh, cry, and rejoice together along the way. New paths are not forged easily. Still, we choose to stand on faith and take the next steps even when those steps are excruciatingly difficult.
My prayer for this blog is that it will be a testament to the faithfulness of God, to His goodness, and to His grace upon our lives because we are truly Beautifully Held.